How do you To Do?

This will be short and sweet. I debated whether to post this, but figured if it's already out there, what the hay.

There is a blog called ToDoList which I recently found, which shows hand-written lists from all kinds of people on wildly varying topics. It's a great site for inspiration and insight...especially since I just recently realized that in order to get my life at least somewhat organized, I need to write things down to make them more concrete (and so I won't forget...). So I've got running lists going on groceries, errands, work projects, kids homework, doctors appointments, and much more. And I pity the poor fool who mistakes one of my little crumpled lists for a piece of trash to throw away...

Anyway, since the ToDoList blog invites people to send in their own lists, I decided that one of mine in particular was indeed worth sharing (here's the link to my list, but wait until after you've finished reading this post to go there...)

The list I sent includes my aspirations for improving my parenting skills (written way before I discovered the list blog). I am constantly trying to remind myself that I need to listen more, dictate less...and everything that goes along with that. It's funny that so many of the things on the list should come naturally, but they don't. In fact, I don't even manage some of them most of the time. I wrote this list (after thinking about it for a long time) while sitting in my car waiting for my oldest son as he did his 2 hour gifted evaluation (mentioned in an earlier post).

I try to read the list at least once a day, to really internalize it. I've even considered making each item into a little sign and posting them around my house...haven't done that yet.

Now you can go ahead and click on the link...see what you think, and add your own suggestions!

Ahh yes, and as Fats Waller so soothingly tells us, "I"m gonna sit right down and write myself a letter...."

How does my garden grow?

Sprouting sweet peas, carrots and lettuce. At least THEY listen to me!

And as one of the songs on a children's folk music CD that I never really liked (but is immensely appropriate here) goes: "Inch by inch, row by row, gonna make this garden grow. All it takes is a rake and a hoe and a piece of fertile ground"

Whose reality is this anyway?

Reality is a relative term. I have come to realize that each one of us creates their own reality, according to needs and wants...some aspects are connected to the world around us, others are not.

I live in a bubble, I openly admit that. I prefer not to watch, read or listen to the news (depressing), I selectively forget things that I don't particularly like or want to remember (frustrating). And I'm okay with it...most of the time, because I'm pretty sure that I know when I have to let the real reality in, and deal with it.

But my children don't. I've noticed lately that at least 2 out of 3 of them also have their own reality. The oldest one is almost totally detached - denying (consciously or not) the relationship between his actions and their consequences on the people and world around him. And the youngest one just goes around singing all the time, barely discerning that characters from sesame street and parpar nechmad are not his real friends (I don't actually see a problem with this in a 3-year old, but his ganenet seems to think it's affecting his social skills).

How do I make sure they will know when to let reality in? And face it? and deal with it? Did they learn to create these alternative realities because that's what I do? Is that something they would pick up on?

I don't know if there is some kind of test for these things (I suppose life itself provides enough opportunities), but it's definitely time for a reality check.

And, as one of my favorite Billy Joel songs, Summer Highland Falls, goes:
"And though we choose between reality and madness, it's either sadness or euphoria"